i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
Randomize
