If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
Randomize