is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
Randomize