ha. weirdest feeling ever. just wiped my ass with my non-dominant hand. (eating cheeseburger with right one)
Your grandmother is in heaven weeping.
it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
Life without a bra equals bliss.
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
there is glitter all over my balls
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
