Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
Randomize
