Whoa Z and x make the same sound
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
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