Tried to buy Xanax from my boss last night. Wrong Mike.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
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