Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Randomize
