sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
Randomize
