I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Randomize
