Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
Randomize