I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
the vacuum is drunk
what?
i spilled my drink and tried to vacuum it and now the vacuum is drunk
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
I enjoy the company of your penis
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