Fuck appropriateness.
LMAO!!! just remembered you said this to me last night. "sometimes you post too many Jesus tweets. It's not that that's really bad... But I roll my eyes and you should know that."
I was drunk but it's true
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
