my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
Randomize
