Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
