maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize
