woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
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