He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
Randomize
