a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
In case this wasn't clear when i said being his wingman was "hopeless", his date walked out on him when he poured a beer on his head trying to shotgun it
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
