I'm so fucking centered right now
party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
Randomize
