i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
Randomize
