is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
Can you bring me the toilet please
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
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