this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
Randomize
