We need to rekindle our bromance
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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