whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
I may or may not have eaten the rest of your birthday cake last night after getting blazed and watching harry potter.
i think you have the wrong number
so then it wasn't your birthday cake. k, cool.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
Randomize
