so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
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