i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
Randomize
