But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
Randomize
