CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Randomize