lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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