You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
