he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
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