dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
Randomize
