Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
So I come home this morning to get ready for a job interview and there is garlic seasoning all over the hardwood and a knife in the wall. What. the. fuck.
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