i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
How drunk was I last night?
You tried to unlock a door with your dick. That drunk.
Not the explanation for the cock bruise that I was looking for.
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