I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
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