we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
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