The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
Randomize
