My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
Randomize
