I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Randomize