so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
