Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
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