Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
You need Xanax blowdarts
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
Randomize