Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
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