I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize