You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Randomize
