Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
soo... how was my night?
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