Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
Randomize
