On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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