I must be too annoying 4 u.
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Randomize
