you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
Drunk is not a location!
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
Randomize
