She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
Randomize
